The Things I Said I’d Never Do

We have such high (and often unrealistic) hopes for ourselves when they’re freshly born, don’t we?

Just for fun, so we can all have a good hearty laugh together, these are the things I said I’d never do before I became a parent (in my infinite and knowing wisdom). Eye roll.

  • feed them sugar
  • let them ‘cry it out’
  • kiss them on the mouth
  • lose my patience (ya ummmm ok)
  • give them screen time
  • feel the urge to shake them (sorrrrryyy but if you’re a colic mama you’ll understand)
  • cater to them by making a separate meal at dinner (or breakfast… or lunch…)
  • let their nap schedule dictate my day
  • use food or TV as a reward
  • stress about taking them on a plane (ha. ha. HAAAAAAA)
  • miss being in the workforce
  • eat food my toddler has dropped on the floor
  • eat food my toddler has dropped out of her own mouth
  • talk about my kid’s poops in great detail with my spouse
  • skip a workout because I was too tired

…are you rolling on the floor laughing? You should be; I certainly am.

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